“Filler Episodes” in Therapy
How Therapy Ties Together Daily Problems with Deeper Wounds, and Reminds You That You are the Director of Your Life’s Story
I am a huge fan of sci-fi TV shows, so I couldn’t help but stop by to see them over at Bookman’s (1056 S. Country Club Dr., Mesa, AZ 85210). I love the ethical morality components usually integrated into this genre, as well as how they balance the focus between smaller problems and larger season themes. As I realize this, I recognize that I have a similar love for the way that therapy fluctuates between day-to-day issues and connects those to a larger theme underneath to address.
A lot of people will not be sure what to bring up in therapy, usually worrying about whether or not what they have to say is important enough. It is okay if it isn’t! In a TV show, we might call those a “monster of the week episode” or a “filler episode”, but those are still important for the show. Usually filler episodes help us see the complexity of a character, notice the layers within relationships, and it drops hints as to the larger problem going on in the background. “Filler” sessions do the same thing.
You ever notice how in a TV show, there are usually a lot more “monster of the week” or “filler” episodes at the beginning of the series? This helps create the setting, giving context to the bigger theme, and gives us time to settle into exploring more. In therapy, it can feel a lot more comfortable to start there with more day-to-day issues. Then as more time goes on together, the stage is set, we start feeling more comfortable together, and we start picking up on hints to larger themes, we naturally turn our focus to the deeper problems to address.
A therapist is a bit like an editor for the show that is your life. We see all that the writers have given, see what the director finds important to show us, and we narrow it down to help focus everything to a clear and engaging story. Our audience? It is you! We want you to see your story more clearly so that you can feel the depth of your story without getting lost in it. We also aim to help you see the direction your story is heading so that you remember your own agency in creating it.
You are the director, whereas life is the writer. Life will throw things your way, and you can go with it, maybe give it your own flavor, but you can also ask writers to change things. As the director, you get to decide how the story comes across on the screen, how it is experienced and felt. When you don’t step in to direct it, you don’t feel engaged in your own life, it feels empty, boring, and aimless. You are the one who brings your story to life. You make it worth your attention.
